{"id":1134,"date":"2018-07-31T16:16:38","date_gmt":"2018-07-31T12:46:38","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/thefibrolupusbutterf2647.live-website.com\/?p=1134"},"modified":"2018-07-31T16:28:26","modified_gmt":"2018-07-31T12:58:26","slug":"this-the-day-which-the-lord-hath-made","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/thefibro-lupusbutterfly.com\/?p=1134","title":{"rendered":"This the Day which the Lord Hath Made"},"content":{"rendered":"

I live in the country.. I love the country! All the privacy, beautiful landscape…we even have an apple orchard and a pond…it’s lovely.<\/p>\n

However, if I have to grocery shop, it’s easily a twenty to thirty minute drive. If I need other things, it takes longer.<\/p>\n

All that driving to town never bothered me before I got sick. I mean, I just planned the day to shop for whatever was needed and off I went!<\/p>\n

And then I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia.<\/p>\n

Now, there is no PLANNING because I NEVER know what a day is going to be like for me physically<\/i>.<\/p>\n

There is NO anything. What I mean by that is my life has been turned upside down with pain and physical limitations.<\/p>\n

I miss the “old” days. I miss my old self.<\/p>\n

-here is some insider personality info-<\/em><\/p>\n

My Italian lineage causes me to use my entire <\/i>being when I talk (animated, hands waving, whole body conversations). Subsequently and due to the pain of being “me”, I have learned to “tone it down” by just not talking as much or answering with as few words as possible.<\/p>\n

On the rare occasions that this side of me comes out, I become keenly aware of the pain as my arms begin to flail and my hands go a mile a minute.<\/p>\n

The pain is horrific.<\/p>\n

People equate me to my animated personality and when I speak in a mellow fashion, they immediately ask “Are you feeling okay?”<\/p>\n

Loaded question.<\/p>\n

Am I okay?<\/p>\n

Well now, do I want to be the type of person who really<\/i> says how I feel knowing that person will never ask again?<\/p>\n

No, I don’t.<\/p>\n

So instead I just smile and say, “Why yes…I’m feeling fine.”<\/p>\n

FINE…<\/i>what does that even mean?<\/p>\n

I like to be jumpy for my kids. I have ten of them, six still at home, and the first half of them remember a completely different Momma.<\/p>\n

The older ones still here and going to college, have seen what Fibro has done to me. They had to get used to the new me just as I have.<\/p>\n

The younger ones think when I get all animated that “Something must be wrong with Mom.”<\/p>\n

Taking pain meds brings out my older self so the ones who know me best know I must be “on” something to be acting like that.<\/p>\n

-end of insider personality info-<\/em><\/p>\n

I miss me. The old me.<\/p>\n

I struggle daily with acceptance and denial. Sometimes I have “got this” and other times I just want to curl up and wish it away.<\/p>\n

Being creative helps me keep my mind off the pain. But I pay for it later. Like, cannot move later. *click here for my latest creative thought.<\/a><\/p>\n

It’s a vicious cycle.<\/p>\n

I would not change where I live for anything. Hearing the birds and seeing the beauty God designed brings me comfort and peace.<\/p>\n

Yes, driving hurts me. Yes, I drive more often than I want to and even drive on BAD pain days. Mainly because my dear husband receives blood transfusions about every nine-ten days and we drive over an hour to the city for his bone cancer conditon. (We both got a health whammy within a few years while still in our 40’s…)<\/p>\n

I will always be there for him, pain or not!!<\/p>\n

My life around me still goes on. It still makes me smile, it still gets me through and it still brings me love. That is a gift. <\/i><\/p>\n

So here is to today!<\/p>\n

Rain or shine…zombified or not….road kill and left for dead…<\/p>\n

“This is the day which the Lord hath made, we will rejoice and be glad in it!”<\/i><\/p>\n

Blessings and gentle hugs-<\/p>\n

~The Fibro Momma of Ten<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

trying the best to be the you you are now with Fibromyalgia <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_uf_show_specific_survey":0,"_uf_disable_surveys":false,"ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[10],"class_list":["post-1134","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-living-with-fibro","without-featured-image"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p8ZH8C-ii","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":1354,"url":"https:\/\/thefibro-lupusbutterfly.com\/?p=1354","url_meta":{"origin":1134,"position":0},"title":"Just a Blog About Fibro","author":"fibropage1","date":"October 26, 2019","format":false,"excerpt":"Today I am just writing a blog about living with Fibromyalgia.\u00a0 What does that mean?\u00a0 It means that I am just a normal person whose life has ups and down same as anyone. 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