{"id":1501,"date":"2025-06-18T18:08:58","date_gmt":"2025-06-18T14:38:58","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/thefibro-lupusbutterfly.com\/?p=1501"},"modified":"2025-06-18T18:09:01","modified_gmt":"2025-06-18T14:39:01","slug":"what-to-say","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/thefibro-lupusbutterfly.com\/?p=1501","title":{"rendered":"What to Say"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Recently my husband asked me how I was feeling.\u00a0<\/p>\n

I responded with “That’s a loaded question because I don’t want to come across as always complaining.”<\/p>\n

He smiled a knowing smile of “trying to understand.”\u00a0<\/p>\n

Then said, “Maybe you could come up with a phrase that would tell me how you feel.\u00a0 For example,\u00a0 ‘I’m fine’ might mean you feel run over, broken or hurting. If you say ‘I’m okay’ it might mean ‘today isn’t as bad’ ”\u00a0<\/p>\n

So, I have been pondering what he said in trying to figure out responses that are positive, but would also relay to him how I’m really feeling.<\/p>\n

When you are in the middle of a pain flare, being positive is not the first thing that comes to mind. We have to practice that.<\/p>\n

It’s not really lying about how you feel, it’s trying to be optimistic.<\/h2>\n

We battle ourselves each day. Our mind can suffer; being optimistic is a learned trait.\u00a0<\/p>\n

It can be very difficult to be optimistic when your joints literally feel like they are dangling by a thread and it’s all you can do to sit down or pick up a cup of tea.<\/p>\n

So, the next time he asks how I am doing, and I say “I’m fine,” he will know what that means…<\/p>\n

Because God knows how we feel no matter what we say…or don’t say. We are all broken and in need of a savior.\u00a0<\/p>\n

The beginning of the song and chorus, Truth Be Told<\/em> <\/a>by Matthew West speaks volumes…<\/p>\n

Here are the beginning lyrics:<\/p>\n

“Lie number one, you’re supposed to have it all together…And when they ask how you’re doing, just smile and tell ’em, “Never better”…<\/p>\n

Lie number two, everybody’s life is perfect except yours….So keep your messes and your wounds and your secrets safe with you behind closed doors…<\/p>\n

Truth be told, the truth is rarely told…I say, “I’m fine, yeah, I’m fine, oh, I’m fine, hey, I’m fin\u0435”<\/p>\n

But I’m not, I’m broken.<\/p>\n

And when it’s out of control, I say it’s under control…But it’s not ….and You know it<\/p>\n

I don’t know why it’s so hard to admit it-Wh\u0435n being honest is the only way to fix it-There’s no failure, no fall, there’s no sin You don’t already know…So let the truth be told.”<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/p>\n

Tell Jesus how you feel. Rant, rave, let it out so when your loved asks, and you say “I’m fine” they will know what you mean and the truth will be told.\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

Blessings-<\/p>\n

~The Fibro Momma of Ten<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n ","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Recently my husband asked me how I was feeling.\u00a0 I responded with “That’s a loaded question because I don’t want to come across as always complaining.” He smiled a knowing smile of “trying to understand.”\u00a0 Then said, “Maybe you could come up with a phrase that would tell me how you feel.\u00a0 For example,\u00a0 ‘I’m… Continue reading What to Say<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"_uf_show_specific_survey":0,"_uf_disable_surveys":false,"ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1501","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","without-featured-image"],"aioseo_notices":[],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/ph40Aj-od","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":1682,"url":"https:\/\/thefibro-lupusbutterfly.com\/?p=1682","url_meta":{"origin":1501,"position":0},"title":"Feeling run-over, but with no regrets","author":"Fibro Momma of 10","date":"April 9, 2026","format":false,"excerpt":"Yesterday I did a thing and today I feel the affects of it. Did I know when I set out to drive 1.5 hours (each way) to visit my grandkiddos yesterday that I would feel completely run over today?\u00a0 \u00a0 Well, yes and no.\u00a0 Yes, because ever since Fibromyalgia entered\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/thefibro-lupusbutterfly.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/04\/Screenshot_20250519_063915_Chrome.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":612,"url":"https:\/\/thefibro-lupusbutterfly.com\/?p=612","url_meta":{"origin":1501,"position":1},"title":"Fibromyalgia and the Guilt Complex","author":"fibropage1","date":"September 23, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"You may have read on other blogs about how some people with Fibromyalgia lovingly tell friends and family that they cannot attend an event or host a gathering and bow-out \"gracefully.\" In this post I we will speak about the realities of the guilt involved by doing this and its\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Fibromyalgia Family Life"","block_context":{"text":"Fibromyalgia Family Life","link":"https:\/\/thefibro-lupusbutterfly.com\/?cat=21"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/thefibro-lupusbutterfly.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/08\/3546ea813f79a4b657ac2cb8ad1ff0c7-fibromyalgia-quotes-chronic-illness.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":1871,"url":"https:\/\/thefibro-lupusbutterfly.com\/?p=1871","url_meta":{"origin":1501,"position":2},"title":"Being Your Own Advocate for Lupus","author":"Fibro Momma of 10","date":"May 26, 2026","format":false,"excerpt":"So, you start your list for your next encounter with your doctor, trying to be your own advocate for your health.\u00a0\u00a0 You write your symptoms, which makes you look like a hypochondriac. You write how difficult it is to get moving each day. How the \"tin-man syndrome \" lasts for\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1636,"url":"https:\/\/thefibro-lupusbutterfly.com\/?p=1636","url_meta":{"origin":1501,"position":3},"title":"Rainy Days, Baking and Fibromyalgia","author":"Fibro Momma of 10","date":"March 3, 2026","format":false,"excerpt":"Today I awoke to rain. And not just a little rain, but a continual dropping. The forecast says it is to rain non-stop here in the Midwest for the next 10 days and that means nasty pain for Fibro and Lupus sufferers.\u00a0 It is hard for me to manage pain\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/thefibro-lupusbutterfly.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/03\/20250212_091455.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":1652,"url":"https:\/\/thefibro-lupusbutterfly.com\/?p=1652","url_meta":{"origin":1501,"position":4},"title":"Being Scared of Living with Chronic Pain","author":"Fibro Momma of 10","date":"March 29, 2026","format":false,"excerpt":"I'm scared.\u00a0 Not scared that someone will harm me. Not scared of dying (because I gave my life to Jesus and I know He has saved me and I will go to heaven). Not scared of animals. Not scared of anything like that.\u00a0 I'm scared of what I do today\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/thefibro-lupusbutterfly.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/074eb5cef9d8b21fc087abf492936955-fibromyalgia-pain-chronic-pain-480x561.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":1840,"url":"https:\/\/thefibro-lupusbutterfly.com\/?p=1840","url_meta":{"origin":1501,"position":5},"title":"A Husband’s View of Lupus and Fibromyalgia","author":"Fibro Momma of 10","date":"May 8, 2026","format":false,"excerpt":"In honor of National\u00a0Lupus Awareness Day (May 10th) and National Fibromyalgia Awareness Day (May 12th), my hubby wrote a few words to share with other husbands who are wanting to help their wives who are battling Fibromyalgia and\/or Lupus. \"As a husband living with a Fibro\/Lupus sufferer, it can be\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/thefibro-lupusbutterfly.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/05\/Screenshot_20250810_210737_Facebook.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/thefibro-lupusbutterfly.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/05\/Screenshot_20250810_210737_Facebook.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/thefibro-lupusbutterfly.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/05\/Screenshot_20250810_210737_Facebook.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/thefibro-lupusbutterfly.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/05\/Screenshot_20250810_210737_Facebook.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x"},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/thefibro-lupusbutterfly.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1501","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/thefibro-lupusbutterfly.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/thefibro-lupusbutterfly.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thefibro-lupusbutterfly.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thefibro-lupusbutterfly.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1501"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/thefibro-lupusbutterfly.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1501\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/thefibro-lupusbutterfly.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1501"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thefibro-lupusbutterfly.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1501"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thefibro-lupusbutterfly.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1501"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}