Recently my husband asked me how I was feeling.
I responded with “That’s a loaded question because I don’t want to come across as always complaining.”
He smiled a knowing smile of “trying to understand.”
Then said, “Maybe you could come up with a phrase that would tell me how you feel. For example, ‘I’m fine’ might mean you feel run over, broken or hurting. If you say ‘I’m okay’ it might mean ‘today isn’t as bad’ ”
So, I have been pondering what he said in trying to figure out responses that are positive, but would also relay to him how I’m really feeling.
When you are in the middle of a pain flare, being positive is not the first thing that comes to mind. We have to practice that.
It’s not really lying about how you feel, it’s trying to be optimistic.
We battle ourselves each day. Our mind can suffer; being optimistic is a learned trait.
It can be very difficult to be optimistic when your joints literally feel like they are dangling by a thread and it’s all you can do to sit down or pick up a cup of tea.
So, the next time he asks how I am doing, and I say “I’m fine,” he will know what that means…
Because God knows how we feel no matter what we say…or don’t say. We are all broken and in need of a savior.
The beginning of the song and chorus, Truth Be Told by Matthew West speaks volumes…
Here are the beginning lyrics:
“Lie number one, you’re supposed to have it all together…And when they ask how you’re doing, just smile and tell ’em, “Never better”…
Lie number two, everybody’s life is perfect except yours….So keep your messes and your wounds and your secrets safe with you behind closed doors…
Truth be told, the truth is rarely told…I say, “I’m fine, yeah, I’m fine, oh, I’m fine, hey, I’m finе”
But I’m not, I’m broken.
And when it’s out of control, I say it’s under control…But it’s not ….and You know it
I don’t know why it’s so hard to admit it-Whеn being honest is the only way to fix it-There’s no failure, no fall, there’s no sin You don’t already know…So let the truth be told.”
Tell Jesus how you feel. Rant, rave, let it out so when your loved asks, and you say “I’m fine” they will know what you mean and the truth will be told.
Blessings-
~The Fibro Momma of Ten
