October. My favorite month of the year. Fall decorations, changes in the weather, pumpkins, windy days with leaves floating overhead…and Fibromyalgia woven throughout each day.
Also this month, I have had a daughter birthday…music way upstate…another daughter birthday…canning green beans and hot pepper relish…another daughter birthday…a music contest…a day spent shopping for flooring…a daughter’s engagement…more music…major renovations on our house like laying subfloors and taking out walls….music…wedding planning…doctor appointment for me…hours and hours of my dachshund in labor (they never give birth during the day!)…another birthday coming up, complete with a party…more music…
Well, that about sums up my life since the first of October! (And that is not including homeschooling, grocery shopping, laundry, cooking meals…you know, regular, everyday life).
Where does the Fibromyalgia fit in??
Every moment of the day and all in varying forms.
Recently my body locked up from the neck down-which lasted about 30 minutes, making me feel like I was literally in cement-(which is the fourth episode of that this year).
Every day my joints scream at me…and most days it takes a lot for me to function (brain fog).
This renovation we are doing inspires my creative genius, giving me a drive to get it done, which, in my experience, makes me think that creativity is a form of natural “drug” to help (at least me) get through my life of pain.
But when the day is over and my body is tired, that pain seems to multiply and overtake me.
It is a roller-coaster ride of never-ending pain!
There may be days (especially gloomy, cold and wet ones) where all I desire to do is curl up with a blanket and do…nothing. However, my life is not conducive to doing nothing.
I must be all things to everyone in my life…
Some days I am a little slower.
Some days it does not all get done.
Some days drilling math facts, reviewing vocabulary and spelling words and reading out loud to my kiddos is all I can muster.
Some days I’m like the Little Engine that Could and I say to myself “I think I can…I think I can…I think I can…”
I have yet to hear myself say “I knew I could…” without the pain from what I did…
But, it is my life and I am thankful for it-pain or no pain.
I wonder what that would be like??
Have a blessed day and be sure to be the reason those around you smile!
~The Fibro Momma of Ten