Daily life with Fibromyalgia is not an easy thing. Life still goes on. The sun still rises and the family still wakes up. Shopping still needs to happen, laundry still needs to be washed, dried, folded and put away. Dishes still need to be completed before the next meal….and we don’t need to talk about the “next” meal! There is always something to be done when you run a household.
Fibromyalgia makes everything more challenging. When I was first diagnosed, my pain days were several times a week. It gradually went to all week and then some days were worse than others. Today, I can barely get through the mornings, rest, then barely get through the afternoons before collapsing in the evenings. This is not me complaining. I am just telling it like it is.
Fibromyalgia has turned this “go-getter” of a woman into a shell of my former self. I look like the same me…only slower. I don’t look like I am suffering…because I still smile and try to be friendly (when most days I am fighting back MAJOR tears just from walking). I still plan out things, but most of the time I am the reason the “plan” changes.
Most people have no idea what I am dealing with. Fibromyalgia is called the “Invisible Illness” because it affects the inside. That alone is a blessing! I have often said if I looked like I feel, I would scare the heck out of everyone!
Fibromyalgia is not consistent. The PAIN is, but the places where the pain hits varies. Last week it was my feet and hips. This week it was my hips and tailbone….and feet…
Some days my head is so sensitive it hurts to brush my hair. Some days I can barely lift my arms and hook my, um…here it comes…bra- *sigh* Some days my hips hurt so bad I can scarcely walk, sit or move.
Fibromyalgia messes with the brain, too. They call it Fibro-fog and it is a real thing and it is a drag. (I should take stock in Post-it Notes!)
Each day with Fibromyalgia is a constant battle. I can have a flare 3x or more in a day. I need to rest at those times throughout those days.
Today, I shampooed the carpets while my husband and sons redid faucets and fixed the leaking pipe. It took me 2 hours to do the hallway and living room. Back and forth motions and Fibro DO NOT mix. I knew what was in store for me later, but it needed to be done and, yes, I am one of those types who likes to clean and likes the satisfaction of a job well done. This goes against my Fibro body. When the carpets were done, so was I. (actually, I was done half way through!!) I gingerly sat in my comfy glider as silent tears slid down my cheeks from the intense pain I had everywhere. My prayers increased as I waited for the pain to work its way up and out. (The pain never did make its way out, just saying.)
I ended up laying on the sofa and dozing off for 45 minutes. I awoke with the usual “Oh, my word, can this pain get any worse tin-man syndrome.” Slowly, ever-so-slowly, I managed to move my limbs and work those joints. 20 minutes later and two daughters to help me up and I began moving again. That was a flare moment.
Now, I still moved rather slowly the rest of the day, feet throbbing, tailbone needing a pillow to sit in the chair at the dinner table. It is the way my life is-my “thorn on the side.” But guess what? I have Jesus to give me His strength all day long. This is the life He has chosen for me and I cannot feel sorry for myself, although that can be a battle of its own some days.
Fibromyalgia has taught me how to live life one minute at a time. Yes, I feel robbed of my old self…I miss my old brain…and I morn those things often, but that it all a part of the acceptance process to which I am still in the process of accepting!!!
Life still goes on, even with a chronic pain condition. You can get through the day, even if it’s only a moment at a time. And really, that’s how everyone should get through their days!
So, from one Fibro to another-gentle hugs and God bless you!
